It's taped (recorded? I am so 1995) and ready to be viewed one of these days. I ended up strapping on the gym shoes and hitting the treadmill last night at 7:30pm.
I pick up my bridesmaid dress today, and yes, the fear has hit. Hardcore. Will it fit? Who knows.
All I ate yesterday was an arugula salad with a little turkey on it and a protein shake after my workout. I would like to eat more (I know I need to eat more) but the thought of NOT fitting into that dress literally has me shaking. I haven't even told Brian that we have a dry run scheduled to tonight that requires putting me in the dress, since I know it will ruin his day. (It takes a village, people. I'm not joking).
The thing is, the dress actually does fit - it was the zipper that was causing me all kinds of angst. About three months worth of angst, until I realized that the zipper kept getting stuck on a button. In my Catholic-guilt 'it must be me' mentality, I just assumed that I was too big for the dress and that's why it wasn't zipping. Once Brian and I figured it out (after some tears, I admit, and some rather choice words on my part), I felt a lot better. But the dress still didn't look good (and was missing the clasp after my 'Hurt Closet' experience circa January 2010). The only word that came to mind once the blue frock was in place? Fleshy. Lots and lots of...flesh.
I'm not quite sure what or who shifted during pregnancy, but things just aren't the same. There is some serious armpit boob going on. And some ample back fat, too. I've tried tucking, pinching, corseting, and finally stapling down each problem area, and with no luck. So, I did what every good bridesmaid does when she has 11 days to go until the wedding and a dress that looks mildly horrifying: I stopped eating. And started running like something was chasing me.
The good news (aside from the fact that I haven't passed out yet?): I'm down a solid five pounds. The bad news? I really have about 25 more to go. And I could wax poetic about how my new, post-baby body is strong and powerful and brought life into this world (blah, blah), but let's face it: unless the damn dress fits, no one cares that I have a baby. Or the fact that I've had almost eleven months to lose the weight and get back into shape. (I will say this -- I am 4 pounds lighter than my pre-pregnancy weight, which means I've lost 51 pounds in 10 months, three weeks, and two days. But it means nothing when you have armpit boobs).
So, yes, I didn't watch 'The Bachelorette' yesterday since I have committed myself to the gym for the next few days. I am curious to see how the date with Kirk went, only because he's from Green Bay and I want to watch Brian get all excited about his favorite city. I hope they don't eat cheese curds...
Oh, and the handles in the kitchen look A-M-A-Z-I-N-G. Wayne, the handle man, has a serious passion for handles. He spent hours drilling and measuring and assembling the handles. He even got me in on the action by requesting I remove the sticky little drawer stoppers (not sure of their official name) and replacing them with quality ones (free!). I was kind of bummed since I really wanted to watch Oprah (and Scotty was down for his nap), but if it meant better cabinets, than I was willing. He also brought the best tool ever into my life - the Minwax cabinet pen (in Golden Oak) that repairs and covers scratch marks. It's so fun to use! I plan to purchase my own today. I can't believe we just dramatically improved the look and condition of our cabinets in one easy afternoon. I feel like I should go into the cabinet business now.
So, give me some time to watch 'The Bachelorette' and hopefully, I'll be able to hear Ali's musings over the rumble in my tummy. Argh.