The Bed Rest Book Club
Share it!
  • Blog
  • About
  • Dining (Vegan and Nonvegan)
  • Running Stuff
  • Recipes!

TV Review: The Bachelor

1/4/2011

2 Comments

 
Ah, Brad Womack.

He's baaaaa-aaaack.

In the sake of fairness, I need to report that I did not watch his season (which apparently was the comment du-jour of the night, poor guy.) Because if you are like me and had to Google him, he's the guy that spurned both Jenni and Deanna and somehow earned him the reputation of the most hated guy in America. I thought that belonged to Wes? I don't fault the guy for not picking either girl; I mean, how is that worse than say what the English guy did by picking Lorenzo Lamas' daughter, showing up at about 12 red carpet events, and then breaking up oh-so-unceremoniously? Or any other Bachelor for that matter. The only Bachelor to find "true love" on the show was Jason, who just recently married Molly - but not before breaking up with Melissa on national television.  (yes, we all know the Trista and Ryan story, but she was the Bachelorette, not the Bachelor.)

Love is a messy, messy thing.

And yet, Brad spent three years in therapy, hashing out his issues and trying to get the root of all evil. (It was the 'I leave before you leave' scenario, ultimately, as a result of an absentee father.)

Anyways, just to keep everyone up-to-date on the Bachelor history, let's remember that Deanna went on to be the Bachelorette and she picked that weird surfer dude but broke Jason Mesnick's heart, who became the next big B and picked Molly (after that whole Melissa nastiness), and his season introduced us to Jillian (loved her!) who picked Ed who had trouble in the bedroom ("he was sunburned...and tired...and hungry." Um...okay) but spurned Jake who later became the Bachelor and despite his good looks and white teeth, he was really a psycho who argued with Vienna in front of a very concerned Chris Harrison and Tenley ended up falling in love with Kiptyn but not before Ali (Yellow Ali, as I dubbed her) was the Bachlorette and picked Roberto and left the lovely Chris L heartbroken with his plaid couch with his dead mother and adorable golden retrievers.

Did he have a golden retriever or am I making that up? It's all starting to blur together.

Whew. I really need to turn off the TV.

The point here: Brad's second season brings us full circle.

And I'm guessing the producers went through several possible subtitles, much like Jake's "On the Wings of Love" or the English's guy (what was his name??) "London Calling!." Here are Brian's and my guesses:

The Bachelor: What I Learned in Therapy

The Bachelor: The Flogging of Brad Womack

The Bachelor: Damn the Yankees
(was it me or did every girl with a Southern accent get a rose?)

The Bachelor: I Forgot my Anxiety Meds in the Limo; Please Don't Yell at Me Tonight

(the last one is my favorite)

Okay, let's get to the good stuff: the ladies. Um...wow. Was it me or did they intentionally set up the beautiful, widowed Southern Belle to be the last story, and then always play that cheesy music every time she was on screen? I get it, I get it: Emily organizes fundraisers at a children's hospital. She lost the love of her life in a plane crash and found out she was pregnant right after the funeral. She has impossibly slender legs. Yes, we get it: she's perfect. She is the Tenley of this season (or is Keltie?? Keltie is super bubbly but Emily has a great tan. I call this one a draw.)

But it's clear to say that Michelle (?), the hairdresser from Utah, is the villian. Madison, Ye of the Fangs, must have missed the bus to the VH-1 studio and somehow winded up on squeaky-clean ABC and then pretended to bite Brad's neck as he inexplicably offered her a rose. Ashley the Dentist looks just like Ashley the One who Dressed up Like a Flight Attendant from Jake's season and looks mindlessly needy. I was surprised Alli, aka Booty Girl ("A guy broke up with me because he said my booty wasn't petite enough!") got a rose, and ditto for both Chantels (or Shawntel, depending on your preference). But good-bye, blond girl in the black dress who looks like a cross between Kristin Cavalleri and Kim from Real Housewives of Atlanta. As Brian commented, "You watch so much reality TV that you are actually starting to compare all of them."

Yes, I get it. I need to turn off the TV. But as I told him, this is research for the blog...

But our bachelor stayed the course and tried really, really hard to convince everyone he has changed. I'm surprised Thomas Parker PhD didn't make a surprise appearance during the cocktail party. You could tell Chris Harrison was getting increasing uncomfortable as Brad blathered on about how he's changed, what he's learned, etc, and Chris was probably motioning to the producers, "Send in the therapist! He's been talking for three hours!" I am happy, however, that therapy got the national spotlight and I'm sure Dr. Parker's phone is probably ringing off the hook right now.

Okay friends, let's make some predictions: who has legs? I'm putting money on Emily the coal-miner's daughter and Michelle from Salt Lake City. I think Lindsay is a wild card, only because she's from Texas, too. What about Nanny Ashley who got the first impression rose? Thoughts? Comments? Is Brad going to have a breakdown this season? Have we seen the last of Jenni and Deanna? Does Chris Harrison want to have dinner at my house?

Discuss, please.
2 Comments
Jill
1/4/2011 02:31:17 am

I fell hook, line, and sinker for the widow!! But I don't really like Brad (not b/c he didn't pick anyone last time, just b/c I don't find him very interesting), so I'm not sure he deserves widow girl.

Reply
Kris
1/4/2011 08:01:05 am

Oh, Kim.....

How I've missed the Bachelor recaps and your witty banter. I wasn't happy when hot Brad didn't pick a girl in the end (I'll call it his "First Season") but I have hopes that he's ready to love......or at least keep some psychos around for a while for my own personal entertainment!!!

Reply



Leave a Reply.

    Picture

    About Me

    Think of this as the epilogue to Bridget Jones' story. Well, mostly. Bridget marries the handsome lawyer, starts a blog while on bedrest, and decides marathon running sounds like fun. Bridget goes through a divorce but keeps running. Hilarity ensues. 

    Archives

    September 2020
    July 2019
    June 2019
    May 2019
    September 2018
    November 2017
    October 2017
    September 2017
    May 2017
    April 2017
    March 2017
    February 2017
    January 2017
    October 2016
    July 2016
    June 2016
    May 2016
    April 2016
    March 2016
    February 2016
    January 2016
    December 2015
    November 2015
    October 2015
    September 2015
    August 2015
    July 2015
    June 2015
    March 2015
    November 2014
    October 2014
    September 2014
    August 2014
    July 2014
    June 2014
    May 2014
    April 2014
    March 2014
    February 2014
    January 2014
    December 2013
    November 2013
    October 2013
    September 2013
    August 2013
    July 2013
    May 2013
    April 2013
    March 2013
    February 2013
    January 2013
    December 2012
    November 2012
    October 2012
    September 2012
    August 2012
    July 2012
    June 2012
    May 2012
    April 2012
    March 2012
    February 2012
    January 2012
    December 2011
    November 2011
    October 2011
    September 2011
    August 2011
    July 2011
    June 2011
    May 2011
    April 2011
    March 2011
    February 2011
    January 2011
    December 2010
    November 2010
    October 2010
    September 2010
    August 2010
    July 2010
    June 2010
    May 2010
    April 2010
    March 2010
    February 2010
    January 2010
    December 2009
    November 2009
    October 2009
    September 2009
    August 2009
    July 2009
    June 2009

    Categories

    All
    Adolescence
    Baby Activities
    Baby Care
    Bed Rest
    Book Reviews
    Bravo Tv
    Breast Feeding
    Cool Stuff
    Craftiness
    Craig\'s List
    Dogs
    Emma
    Ethical Dilemmas
    Family
    Family Relationships
    Food
    Football Season
    Friendship
    Google List
    Grief
    Guest Blogger
    Guest Bloggers
    I Hate Our Neighborhood
    Junior League
    Kernicterus
    Milestones
    Motherdhood
    Motherhood
    Movies
    My Bladder
    New House
    Numbers
    Pending Reviews
    Post Partum
    Potty Training
    Potty-training
    Pregnancy
    Relationships
    Reviews
    Running
    Scary Stuff
    School
    Scotty
    Sleep
    Sororities
    Sunshine Cupcakes
    Surgery
    The Bobby
    The Holidays
    The Miracle Blanket
    The New House
    Todderville
    Toddlerville
    Toys
    Tv
    Tv Review
    Tv Reviews
    Unpopular Opinions
    Vegas
    Weight Loss
    Weird Stuff Kim Says
    Work

    RSS Feed

Thanks for reading!