These Women are Bipolar
These Women are Bat-Sh*t Crazy
So I watched last night's episode with interest. I didn't blog about last week's for one specific reason: I can't stay up until 10pm anymore. Boot camp is back in force, and bright and early on Tuesday morning is Hill Day. This is awkward to admit, but I still get really nervous every Monday night. I worry the alarm won't go off, or the running/sprinting/burpees will be too hard or that I'll puke up dinner from the night before (yesterday, it was broiled salmon, and that would have been so gross coming back up). Weird, I know. But still very scary. So I've started going to bed around 9, meaning I miss the last hour of the show.
But "The Women Tell All" is usually a juicy little way to spend two hours, and with the promise that Courtney was going to appear to defend herself, well, it sucked me in. I took a brief siesta from about 8:30 until 9. Brian found me on the couch, all curled up, exclaimed, "Oh no!" and promptly put a blanket on my bare feet. The little nap revived me and I didn't throw up salmon this morning, so it's really win-win.
It was an interesting study in group dynamics. The women, all clad in their skin-tight sparkly dresses and six-inch heels, looked toned, tan and completely overdone. When did "The Bachelor" become "Real Housewives of an LA Sound Stage"? " They shouted at each other, swore, pointed fingers, and called each other "chihuauas." Aw, snap.
All the familiar faces were there - Blakely, Samantha, the chick that passed out during the rose ceremony, Elyse, Rachel, Kacie B, Kacie S, and of course, Nikki. Who, by the way, I still don't remember. I can't believe she was in the final three; aside from the "divorcee that America fell in love with," I don't know anything about her. Emily, my girl, was there, though I seriously worried about a wardrobe malfunction in her tight purple dress. Clothing aside, she is still the voice of reason in this highly unstable group.
I'm not going to get into the individual issues, but did anyone else notice that the girls bickered and attacked each other -- right up until the Ultimate Villainess (i.e. Courtney) showed up? The whole stage got really quiet, and they turned their laser-focused, overly-made-up eyes on The Girl Nobody Likes. And I don't know about you, but I didn't believe a word Courtney said. The whole "crying-without-tears" was a total sham, and everyone knows that people who touch their mouths while talking is usually a tell-tale sign they are lying. (it's a subconscious little tick).
Courtney is a mess, and she should be. US Weekly is reporting that not only did she take home the final rose, but all of her on-camera behavior has completely shaken Ben and the two are already separated. Not like Ben is a babe in the woods here -- he's far from innocent himself - but US Weekly stated that he avoids confrontation, so instead of talking to her about her behavior, he's giving her the cold shoulder and already dating other women. Also, the taping of "The Women Tell All" was on Feb 24 in LA, with both Ben and Courtney present. A chance for the two to reconcile? Not so, says US Weekly; Ben tweeted the next morning that he was on his way back up to San Fran. Solo.
As for Courtney, I believe she deserves everything that comes her way. I don't buy the whole "I was overwhelmed living in the house" argument - Emily shot that down with "We were all in the same situation that you were, and we coped with it by making friends and finding support" - and the tears/emotion were totally fake. My only regret about the whole two hours is that Emily didn't stand up and yell, "I told you so!" and pound her chest like a proud gorilla.
The real losers here? Us. We've been taken on this ridiculous journey by two people who want nothing more than to promote themselves. Courtney is a model who's landed back-to-back covers of US Weekly and Ben's wine sales have never been better. The audience is the only real loser in this, as we have wasted two hours every Monday night watching this drivel.
Am I going to blog about The Bachelor/Bachelorette next season? I'm not sure. I'm really bummed about this season and how it turned out. I had high hopes in Ben to be a "real" guy that was fun and quirky and unique, and instead, he turned into a creep who couldn't believe a manipulative model liked him and it went to his head. So disappointing.
I'd rather get an extra hour of sleep.